DAY 1: Death and Volcanoes (Rome and Viterbo)
Day Attire: Hiking Attire/Shoes, Night Attire: Casual/Walking Shoes
Necropoli della Banditaccia
The largest necropolis in the entire Mediterranean region holds the remains of over a thousand Etruscans, a.k.a. the OG Italians, buried between the 9th and 3rd centuries BC. The tombs are so well excavated that they look almost precisely as they did back then. Be sure to see the Tomb of the Reliefs. The rest are mostly the same so just see a few, as not to get bored to and of death.
Suggested duration: 60-90 minutes. Visit www.tarquinia-cerveteri.it for more information.
Antica Monterano
If you're a fan of Italian cinema, you might have seen this ghost town featured in several films. It's certainly a good thing it hasn't been featured in American cinema, or it would've probably been blown up by now. Explore the ruins at your leisure and enjoy the peace and quiet of the surrounding fields (with a pre-packed picnic perhaps) before Michael Bay finds out about this hidden gem.
Suggested duration: 60-90 minutes. Visit www.civitavecchia.portmobility.it for more information.
Calcata
No, we're not taking a detour to India. This town, built atop a volcanic plug, was abandoned in the 1930's for fear it would collapse. You'd think that would be the end of this village, but no. A community of Italian hippies ("all we are saying is give pasta a chance") began squatting here in the 1960's and have transformed Calcata into one of the chillest places in Italy. Don't get too comfortable - it's collapse is still imminent - but you wouldn't it know the community's demeanor. Maybe it's all the good vibes keeping it afloat.
Suggested duration: 2-3 hours. Visit www.italyheaven.co.uk for more information.
Mostri Park
The macabre works of art in this park were commissioned in the 16th century by Vicino Orsini, in order to get over the death of his wife, "art therapy" in the most extreme sense. Considering the gloomy nature of the art, he was either madly in love with her while she was alive and straight up depressed after she died or he didn't love her while she was alive, so she haunted the shit out of him after death with a series of well-executed jump scares. Salvador Dali enjoyed his visit here and so will you, but get out before dark.
Suggested duration: 60-90 minutes. Visit www.bomarzo.net for opening times and more information.
Civita di Bagnoregio
What's the deal with Italians building villages on slowly eroding cliffs? It probably seemed like a great idea at the time (great view, natural defense from enemies) but every few decades, a couple homes fall of the cliff - no big deal! Make sure to visit "Civita - the town that is dying" before it, well... dies. You may be annoyed at having to pay an entrance fee to visit but don't be. The remaining dozen residents are saving up to reinforce the village with metal supports, which sounds crazy enough to work, so don't be stingy.
Suggested duration: 2-3 hours. Visit www.visitlazio.com for more information.
STAY THE NIGHT IN: ORVIETO
DAY 2: Ground Round (Terni and Grosseto)
Well of st. patrick
This colossal well was commissioned by the pope in the 1500's in the event of an enemy siege cutting off Orvieto's external water supply (Rome was under siege at the time). While most villagers would probably just turn to wine (wine solves all problems!) then subsequently surrender in a state of drunken passivity, not the resilient villagers of Orvieto, whose impressive feat of engineering is summed up in the inscription "what nature stinted for provisions application has supplied." Maybe wine can't solve all problems.
Suggested duration: 60 minutes. Visit www.inorvieto.it for opening times and more information.
Duomo di orvieto
With all the beautiful cathedrals in Rome, it can be hard to
If there's one thing you must see in Orvieto, it's this cathedral, built in 1290. The inside is probably beautiful but nobody knows for sure, because everyone that comes here is far too mesmerized by the cathedral's beautiful facade to even bother visiting inside.
Suggested duration: 60 minutes. Visit www.orvietoviva.com for opening times and more information.
Foldalatti Orvieto
Although you're only able to tour a small section, the Orvieto Underground spans the length of the entire city of Orvieto. The rest of the inter-connected system is privately-owned. Every store, or private property, includes an underground segment that can be used as seen fit. While most citizens use the extra space for storage, you would hope at least one guy turned his into a man cave.
Duration: 45 minutes. Visit www.orvietounderground.it for times and more information.
Pitigliano
You won't find any "must-see" sights in Pitigliano other than the village itself, best photographed from the outskirts. Once inside, explore the village affectionately called "little Jerusalem" after the Jews who gave the village its unique charm before being not so affectionately run out of town. Intense persecution is the only valid reason you would ever want to leave this charming place.
Suggested duration: 4-6 hours. Visit www.wanderingitaly.com for more information.
STAY THE NIGHT IN: Pitigliano
DAY 3: Seeking Solitude (San Galgano)
CASCATE DEL MULINO
These natural, mineral-enhanced pools were supposedly formed when the god Jupiter got angry at the god Saturn and instead of settling the matter like a grown-god, he threw a lightning bolt at Saturn. You'd think that a god who can throw lightning would have half-decent aim, but no, he missed, and the lightning struck the ground on earth to create these pools. Thanks, I guess. The pools are free to access, so bring your own towel. Don't expect solitude but it's good for your health and your social media clout.
Suggested duration: 2 hours. Visit www.cascate-del-mulino.info for opening times and more information.
Il Giardano dei Tarocchi
Inspired by the Monsters of Bomarzo and Gaudi's Parc Guell in Barcelona, French artist Niki de Saint Phalle began sculpting the tarot-inspired sculptures in this garden in the late 70's, without rest, until she rested in peace in 2002. Even more dedicated - her hubby. He helped her every step of the way, begging the question: "Why can't you be more like Niki de Saint Phalle's husband?"
Suggested duration: 1-2 hours. Visit www.ilgiardinodeitarocchi.it for opening times and more information.
Cappella di San Galgano a Montesiepi
When San Galgano, a noble and a soldier, was challenged with a vision to give up material things, he compared it to the difficulty of "splitting rock with a sword." He probably should have left it at that, because in attempting to prove his point, he struck a stone with his sword and the rock magically split. All that really proved is that you need magic to give up material things but regardless, San Galgano proceeded to give up material things, and probably spent the rest of his life wishing he had just kept his mouth shut.
Suggested duration: 30 minutes. Visit www.sangalgano.info for opening times and more information.
Abbey of San Galgano
The abbey, which was built near the site where San Galgano lived out his days as a hermit, grew to considerable wealth at its peak in the 1200's. Have you learned nothing from the story of San Galgano? Their wealth was looted and the monastery fell toward disrepair less than a century after its construction. Perhaps only now, in it's barren and tattered state, does it evoke a feeling of simplicity that San Galgano would have approved. Explore at your own pace but be sure to stick around for sunset.
Suggested duration: 60-90 minutes. Visit www.sangalgano.info for opening times and more information.